With a dearth of creativity, Hollywood seems to be angling for movie ideas wherever it can get them.

Bobbing through the studio franchise vault, Dune Entertainment and director Joe Carnahan wrangled in a winner with The A-Team.

I’ll admit, I had my doubts before I entered the theater. Whose idea was it to make a multi-million dollar blockbuster based on a television series canceled over 20 years ago? Heck, I’ve never watched more than a few minutes from the original show on TV Land. I’m guessing many in the target demographic have never even heard of the show.

Recast and given a fresh coat of paint (not to mention special effects and action sequences beyond those any 80′s television writer could have dreamed up), 2010′s The A-Team offers a summer action/adventure romp well worth the cost of admission. It stands on its own for audiences completely uninitiated to the A-Team lore like myself.

I’ll try not to spoil too much of the plot, but the movie kicks off right in the center of the action. The film gives each of the four A-Team members a proper introduction as it tells the “origin” story of how the off-beat-but-kick-ass group of commandos joined forces. The story quickly jumps ahead eight years later, though, as our heroes are about to complete another mission for the military (their 81st). Unfortunately, things go wrong and the A-Team end up being framed for a crime they did not commit. Naturally (but very creatively), they bust out of prison to get revenge and clear their names.

The film has action and plenty of it. The filmmakers showed great creativity in the action sequences, including a very clever segment in which the characters “fly” a tank through the air. They avoided most cliches of action movies, making the film feel very fresh and new, despite being based on such an old property.

The quirky characters and the camaraderie and witty banter between them really set this movie apart from the typical summer action drivel. Pacing is also near-perfect as the film never seems to drag.

The filmmakers wisely kept the plot firmly tongue-in-cheek and it never takes itself seriously. It has a zest and fun to it reminiscent of many 80s action flicks.

Needless to say, I came away very impressed with The A-Team. Anyone looking for a fun – if not incredibly deep – summer action film will not be disappointed.

I pity the fool who doesn’t watch this movie! (Sorry, I couldn’t resist).

I would just like to share with everyone a new website from the makers of The Underground. The Bear Report is a satirical website about Missouri State University. Find it at www.bear-report.com. Fake News. Real Funny.

Today Student Government Association posted the official language that will be on the ballot for next week’s elections, held April 5-7.

Issues up for vote include the election of a student body president and vice president, senior class president, five proposals for uses of Wyrick Funds and a potential increase in the Student Involvement Fee.

Jacob Swett and Justin Mellish are running unopposed for President and Vice-President of SGA, although students do have an option to vote “no confidence.”

Two candidates are running for Senior Class President; John Gauthier and Corey Honer.

A proposed $9 increase in the Student Involvement Fee is up for a vote, which would up the fee to $26 .The Student Involvement Fee is used by Student Activities Council to sponsor campus events.

As for the Wyrick proposals, the theme this year appears to be signs, banners and marquees.

One projects asks for funding for large campus maps near visitor parking to better direct newcomers around campus at a cost of about $15,500.

Another project involves planting beds with the Missouri State name set in steel letters with back-lighting at a cost of roughly $82,800.

The third project on the ballot asks for about $19,600 to put banners on 68 light poles around campus and paint some campus fences with the Missouri State colors and logo.

For $43,600, students are asked for money to install electronic marquees that will display current events and emergency information to be located in various high-traffic campus areas.

The final Wyrick proposal on the ballot asks to install an electronic counter in Bear Park South to display the number of open parking spaces currently available at a cost of $74,700.

Wyrick funds will go to projects with the most student votes first and then down the line until the funds are depleted.

The full ballot language can be found online at http://sga.missouristate.edu/. Language of the Wyrick proposals is copied below.

Issue 3: Wyrick Fund Project Proposals 2010

Listed below are Wyrick Fund Project Proposals for 2010. You may vote to approve all, some, or none of the projects. Projects will be funded in the order of votes received until the fund is exhausted or until the cost of the projects exceed the amount remaining in the fund.

1)      Wayfinding Signage

a.       This proposal recommends that new basic double-sided wayfinding signs be installed at the entrance of the Visitor Parking Lot (Lot 13), outside the south entrance to Baker Bookstore near the Plaster Student Union, and at the northwest corner of Carrington Hall.  These signs should be roughly 4 foot by 4 foot.  A final sign should also be located at the southeast corner of the Visitor Parking Lot (Lot 13) that is more significant to drive individuals into the main corridor, and it should include both a permanent map and a location for individuals to take their own personal campus map.   This sign should be roughly 4 foot by 6 foot.  These signs should include lettering and directional arrows on both sides pointing to the four major landmarks.  The signs should also be unified in appearance, strongly influenced by Missouri State University colors (Maroon, White, Gray, and Black), and should include strong elements of the university logo.  The total cost of this project would be $15,550.

2)      Four Corner Signage

a.        The proposal includes a half-oval shaped planting bed with a base made to reflect the limestone (including the red-tinted rock) featured in many of the buildings on the main quad to be installed. Furthermore , it would include  four pillars (also made to reflect the limestone) be erected around the new planting beds that have panels and tops that reflect architectural details seen on Carrington Hall.   We also recommend that the current lettering on the cement facades being removed and be replaced with a large stainless steel plate with “Missouri State” cut out of it in the current university lettering.  This lettering should be backlit.  The project also incudes stainless steel plates with cut-out lettering and backlighting be installed at the other three secondary locations.  Total cost for this project is $82,836.

3)      Light Pole Banners and Fence Painting

a.       This proposal would install 68 Banners on light poles in Lots 13 , 15, 18, 22, 25, 35, 38, 40, and 43 that would be designed by a commission of students to promote school spirit, and the fence facing lot 15, the fences facing east towards national, and the fences facing north towards Grand would all be painted with Missouri State Lettering and the Missouri State Bear head logo.  The Total cost for this project would be $19,586

4)      Current Event Marquees

a.       This proposal would install 12 current event marquee screens, to be located in the dining centers, the library, the student union, Bear Park North and South, Park Central Office building, and Brick City that would display current events on the Missouri State Campus, along with emergency notifications.  The total cost for this project would be $43,661

5)      Bear Park South Parking Counter

a.       This proposal would install a car counting system in Bear Park south that would calculate the number of open spaces in the garage and display those on two signs located near the entrances for the garage.  Those signs would also include a variable message system that could display messages such as “Event Parking” or “Upper level closed due to weather.”  The total cost for this proposal is $74,704.70

A group of Missouri State University students are planning to protest construction of the University Recreation Center, a $22.9 building set to break ground next month.

The protest will occur from 2-to-3 p.m. on Tuesday, March 23, outside Carrington Hall on campus.

“There’s a Facebook group of over 150 students against the construction,” said protest organizer and Missouri State student Heather Welborn. “The most commonly posted reasons to rethink the project range from, ‘I’ll never use it,’ to ‘I don’t want to pay for it.’”

Welborn believes the construction is a waste of valuable resources during a time when the budget is incredibly tight.

“My goal is to shed light on an issue many at Missouri State feel strongly about,” she said. “This project is largely an awareness campaign.”

Welborn plans to circulate a petition calling for a student body re-vote “to see if this project is still in line with how students want their money spent.” Students originally approved a $16.5 million renovation of McDonald Arena in 2006, which later evolved into the construction of an entirely new building.

Welborn said students who cannot attend the protest but are interested in the cause should join a Facebook group called “MSU Students Against Construction of the University Recreation Center.” Information about further efforts to stop this construction will be posted there, she said.

“A protest is a great way to increase awareness on campus,” Welborn said. “It encourages student involvement in shaping and questioning the policies that directly effect them. If you hear about the Rec project for the first time through the protest, we made a difference.”

]]> http://www.msu-underground.com/archives/1114/feed 3 http://www.msu-underground.com/archives/1106 http://www.msu-underground.com/archives/1106#comments Sat, 20 Mar 2010 18:11:06 +0000 Zach http://www.msu-underground.com/?p=1106 by Zach Becker

Featuring a live orchestra, five singers, and 10 dancers, this year’s Spring Dance Concert should provide an engaging and fun experience for the audience.

The performance, titled Fault Lines, features student and faculty performers and will be held March 25-28 at Coger Theatre located in Craig Hall.

The first half will feature three short musical dance pieces, according to Ruth Barnes, Theatre and Dance professor.

Tsiganes, which means “gypsies” in French,” features choreography by Sara Brummel and music by Vittorio Mondi and Astor Piazzola.

A Divine Majority is choreographed by Darryl Kent Clark, while music is by Chopin.

Random Acts of Joy is choreographed by Barnes with music by Paul Shoenfield. Emily Brown provides lighting design for all three pieces.

“It should be kind of silly and funny and hopefully fun for the audience,” Barnes said when discussing Random Acts of Joy.

The second half features a performance of The Seven Deadly Sins, a satirical sung ballet written in 1933 by Germany’s Kurt Weill and Bertolt Brecht during the early rise of the Nazis.

“It is a disconnected story,” Barnes said. “It is kind of a critique of the bourgeoisie and people who say you shouldn’t sin but actually do.

“They encourage other people to sin in order to get ahead in the world and (they encounter) resistance to that on the part of the girls.”

Brummel directs The Seven Deadly Sins, while Amy Muchnick serves as the conductor and music director.

Choreographing duties for the nine-section piece were divided up between Barnes, Brummel and Clark.

“The styles change from one section of the piece to another,” Barnes said. “It’s a real journey that goes around the United States kind of randomly.”

Matthew Wilson is in charge of lighting design for The Seven Deadly Sins, while scenic design is handled by Renee Simmons and costume design by Cynthia Winstead.

“Just having live music is a major change for us,” Barnes said. “It’s great. We’re excited.”

Tickets are $8 for Missouri State students and can be purchased at any box office, online or by calling 417-836-7678.

The event will be held at 7:30 p.m. on Friday and Saturday, March 26-27, and at 2:30 p.m. Sunday, March 28.

Terry Walls wanted to know the truth; the ugly, racist truth.

In 1950, his mother, Mary Jean Price, became the first African American applicant to Missouri State University (then a white’s-only institution known as Southwest Missouri State College).

The college failed to respond to her application, and a Greene County judge ruled against her when she filed suit against the school for their inaction. Denied the opportunity for an education, Price moved on with her life, but the scar of the racially-motivated denial have never really healed.

Sixty-years later, after wafting through the Meyer Library Archives, her son found the sordid details of how the Board of Regents was prepared to go to the Supreme Court to deny his mother’s admission to the school. Price found originally-confidential correspondence letters that indicated this intent in the file along with his mother’s original application to the school.

In 1950, four years prior to when the Supreme Court case Brown vs. Board of Education ordered the desegregation of schools, African American students were unable to attend Southwest Missouri State College unless the studies they wanted to pursue were not offered at Lincoln University, the state’s African American college.

Price, 18 at the time, wanted to be a schoolteacher. She submitted her transcripts and a letter, stating her intentions to study library science, which was not offered at Lincoln.

The college registrar, Guy Thompson, forwarded the letter up the ranks to Southwest Missouri State College President Roy Ellis.

According to facsimile correspondence available from the library archives, President Ellis considered her application a “test case.”

While waiting on the opinion of the college attorney, he mailed four other Missouri college presidents.

In a confidential letter dated November 13, 1950, he related the difficulty of trying to formulate a policy on the admission of potential black students who were eligible under the conditional laws of the time.

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., fought for equal rights for African Americans during the Civil Rights movement. He worked to erase racial inequalities such as policies that denied Mary Jean Price admission to Missouri State University in 1950.

“The College should ask a local Circuit Court for a declaratory judgment,” the letter stated. President Ellis related the feelings of the Board of Regents and how they were discussing, “carrying the matter on to the Supreme Court in case the local Court decided the girl could be admitted.”

This conviction to preventing her admission proved unnecessary, as events would reveal. After the college failed to respond to Price, Tac Kaplan hired attorney Irving Schwab to file a lawsuit against the school on Price’s behalf.

But in the declaratory judgment the Board had hoped for, a judge of the Circuit Court of Greene County ruled against Price. Her chances of attending Missouri State were finished.

“Can you imagine being an 18 year old kid, and having your ambitions dashed?” Walls said. “Sixty years later; nobody acknowledges it, as though it never happened. It did happen, and we were a part of it.”

For him, and others, the fact that the story has gone untold for so long is a shock. According to Walls, his mother never spoke about it until he found the letter and local television station KSPR ran a story on it recently.

Although it was good for Price to finally speak on the matter, “it opened up old wounds,” according to Walls. Price never went on to teach and worked as an elevator operator before marrying and having children. She is now in her late 70s.

See Related Story: Students debate how MSU should respond to story of Mary Jean Price

It is a little-known fact that tired, boring Valentine's music increases the risk of heart attacks.

Well, it’s Valentine’s Day again. And I don’t know about you, but I’m a little tired of the worn-out love songs put on EVERY mix on February 14th. I’m not saying Etta James and Journey don’t have their merits, but I’ve taken the time to put together a more independent playlist for those who want some real good music with real good lyrics. And for those who don’t have a schnookems this Valentine’s Day, I also compiled a break-up/single/I hate you mix. All in good taste, of course.

“You’re More Awesome Than Me” Songs

1. “Thirteen” – Ben Kweller

A love song from ole’ Ben to his wife, about when they first met and “had passionate make-outs with passionate freak-outs”. Lucky.

2. “Til’ Kingdom Come” – Coldplay

“Say you’ll come and set me free, say you’ll wait for me”. I’ll wait for you, Chris Martin. All day.

3. “Home” – Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros

This is a fairly straightforward song, which talks about home being wherever their love is. Plus, you’re privy to a conversation in which Alexander tells Jane how he fell in love with her. It’s very awkward.

4. “My Favorite Book” – Stars

One of the most simple, true songs I’ve ever heard about two people. “I can read you, you’re my favorite book.”

5. “Such Great Heights” – Postal Service

I can still believe that Ben Gibbard, who sadly is now engaged to Zooey Deschanel, is singing these words to me – “And I have to speculate that God himself did make us into corresponding shapes like puzzle pieces from the clay”

6. “Mushaboom” – Feist

Not only is this ridiculously catchy, but it’s a narrative of a young couple “collecting their moments one by one.”

7. “Summertime Clothes” – Animal Collective

Nothing more simple than “I wanna walk around with you.” Plus Animal Collective is amazing.

8. “From Debris” – Matt Pond PA

This is a hopeful love song, about taking your own life ruined by past relationships and using it to form a new one. “From debris, you and me could start something.”

9. “You’re the Good Things” – Modest Mouse

This song is sort of about the bittersweetness of a relationship—for example, icing on a cake, but the cake is at his funeral. Or, “you’re the flowers in my house when my allergies come out.” But even if they bug you, they’re still the good things.

10. “Dogs” – Page France

This song has lyrics about being made for each other and becoming inexplicably part of each other. “If you go blind just trust I was made out of your dust. You were made out of my dust, and the wind will carry us.”

11. “Eyes” – Rogue Wave

This song is kind of cheesy, so I won’t even type out the lyrics. But guess what, it’s cheesy enough for me to like it.

12. “I Love My B****” – Busta Rhymes

The title says it all.

“I’m Alone” Songs

1. “I Would Be Sad” – The Avett Brothers

Oh, the Avetts. A song about a girl leaving him, and them being the “predictable young couple changing moving on.”

2. “Your Ex-Lover is Dead” – Stars

“There’s nothing but time and a face that you lose. I chose to feel it and you couldn’t choose.” This song really is a big middle finger to whoever broke your heart.

3. “Where Does the Good Go?” – Tegan and Sara

Oh Tegan and Sara, the indie twin sisters. They wrote a song about love breaking the seal of always thinking you would be “real happy and healthy, calm and strong.”

4. “Skinny Love” – Bon Iver

Justin Vernon, the musical mastermind behind Bon Iver, writes “I’ll be holding all the tickets, and you’ll be owing all the fines.” Only he could have combined traffic violations and wasted love so well.

5. “Breakin’ Up” – Rilo Kiley

The resounding hook of this song yells “It feels good to be free.” Well a-m-e-n. Enjoy your singledom.

6. “Knife” – Grizzly Bear

Advice – don’t listen to this song if you’re actually sad. Because it’s ridiculously depressing, I mean come on. “With every blow comes another lie. Can you feel the knife?”

7. “Fight Song” – Appleseed Cast

A good song for someone that’s been in an untrusting, accusatory relationship. “We’re finding fault; You kissed her, you slept with him, you didn’t care.” Harsh.

8. “Hand on Your Heart” – Jose Gonzalez

“Well it’s one thing to fall in love, but another to make it last.” Ain’t that the truth?

9. “The Calculation” – Regina Spektor

This song is about a relationship that’s lasted but has hardened into meaninglessness. “We saw our hearts were little stones.” Plus this is quite the toe-tapper. Regina knows what’s up.

10. “Change is Hard” – She & Him

Well, I know I already bashed Zooey Deschanel for dating Ben Gibbard, but I won’t deny her side project with M. Ward has great music. We’ve all let go of someone we wish we hadn’t, but eventually we have to come to grips with it. “I know he’s yours, and he’ll never belong to me again.”

11. “How My Heart Behaves” – Feist

This one actually is sad. Leslie Feist wrote “a cold heart will burst if mistrusted first. A calm heart will break when given a shake.”

12. “Scrubs” – TLC

“I don’t want your number, no. I don’t wanna meet you nowhere. A scrub is a guy that can get no love from me.” Yes, TLC. Sing your hearts out.

In the music industry, having the “edge” is everything. The “edge” could be anything: having exceptional skill, knowing the right people, possessing in an incredible work ethic or simply having great timing.

Of course, it always helps to have a combination of all of the above, such as rock industry producer and native Springfield resident Brandon Mashburn.

Mashburn is known nationally as one of the creative minds behind works by such artists as Breaking Benjamin, Shinedown, DC Talk, and Papa Roach. Mashburn works his edge from the friendly confines of his own home recording studio in Springfield.

Brandon Mashburn

Mashburn’s passion for music started at the age of 10. At the time, his parents moved a 95-year-old piano into his room because they simply had no other place to put it. This served as the catalyst in him spending many of the sunny days of his childhood in the house, learning chords and dominant sevenths and playing the tunes of all his favorite records by ear. At 15, he was doing professional recording gigs.

A few years later, he was doing some production for national acts such as Hootie and the Blowfish and DC Talk, among several others, and in 2004 he met two other musicians from Branson, Missouri, and eventually came to be the bassist in Starlume, a band in the vein of Coldplay and The Fray. He spent several years with Starlume, until he decided that his life’s work was meant to be behind the scenes producing.

“I kind of fell in love with it,” Mashburn said of producing. “I never thought I would do it. I never wanted to really do it, but I kind of fell in love with the process.”

Mashburn is thankful for the many people who helped him get started in producing.

“I was always eager; I never gave up,” Mashburn said, “I had a lot of lucky breaks, with people setting me up early in life, letting me be a part of things. It just kind of grew from there” .

Apparently, the breaks just kept coming, as Mashburn eventually came into contact with industry powerhouse Tom Whitlock through a mutual friend. Whitlock is best known as the songwriter and producer for the multi-platinum Top Gun Soundtrack and engineer for the classic movie Scarface, as well as the winner of a Golden Globe and an Academy Award. After several collaborations on different projects, they decided to officially work together as a team in the music industry.

Mashburn continues working hard behind the scenes. He is the mastermind behind a new album by alternative metal outlet TRUST Company, who are recording in Springfield, and he is also working with a band called Machina, which features members of Evanescence and Future Leaders of the World.

Learn more about Mashburn at www.myspace.com/brandonmashburn.

I read a blog post written by one of my relatives, Nels Lindahl, in which he rated his favorite Star Trek iterations, including both television and movies.

As a Trekkie myself, I was surprised by his rankings of the various Star Trek endeavors, specifically how low DS9 and First Contact rated on his list and how high he placed Generations. Perhaps the readers can weigh in on their opinions and settle this debate.

Here are my rankings:

1. Star Trek: Deep Space Nine (1993 – 1999)

Although the first seasons are pretty good, watch the latter seasons after Worf arrives with the Dominion War and the Defiant. This is one of the few times Star Trek attempts a serial drama where plot lines run over multiple episodes and seasons. I also love the depth of the main characters, the complicated ethics they encounter (Sisko even conspires on a secret assassination, but knows it was right because it will ultimately save billions of lives). The show also boasts a plethora of recurring side characters and excellent villains. I’m not sure why, but this show never gets the credit it deserves.

2. Star Trek: The Next Generation (1987 – 1994)

This is the show that got me hooked on Star Trek originally when I was a kid. It was just winding down as I started watching. It definitely features some excellent episodes, from the action of the Borg to moral choices involving life and death. The first couple seasons, though, quite frankly blow for the most part and this takes it down a notch, compared to DS9 which shined throughout its run. Still, overall this is a great series, although I wish they would have taken a more serial format instead of essentially hitting the reset button each time.

3. Star Trek: The Wrath of Kahn (2nd Film, 1982)

This film is absolutely classic and still tops all other Star Trek films. Ricardo Montalban stands supreme as the ultimate villain and Spock’s sacrifice and Kirk’s eulogy are touching.

4. Star Trek: First Contact (8th Film, 1994)

This is the only Next Gen film really worth its weight. The Borg rank a close second to Khan on the Trek villain scale. While the action was great, I also enjoyed the crew’s interaction with Zephram Cochrane (inventor of warp drive). We do tend to create these false impressions of famous historical figures and create saints out of them. Picard’s vendetta against the Borg for hurting him also provided a great moral dilemma.

5. Star Trek: The Original Series (1966 – 1969)

This is what started it all. The triumvirate of Kirk, Spock, and McCoy provided a moral compass for a western set in space. Some of the episodes are pretty corny by today’s standards and the effects are absolutely horrid; however, plenty of classics still stand out. If you compare this to other space shows of the time period (like Lost in Space), there is no comparison. There is a better tomorrow.

6. Star Trek: The Voyage Home (4th Film, 1986)

The one with the whales is just plain fun. The lighter tone provided a much-needed change of pace from the issues of death and resurrection in 2 and 3. I understand how this fish out of water story entertained mainstream as well as Trek-nerd audiences.

7. Star Trek: XI (11th Film, 2009)

This latest re-envisioning of Star Trek had blockbuster success appealing to main-stream audiences in a way not seen since The Voyage Home. Action packed and with probably the best effects the series has ever seen, it packed a punch on the screen. That said, the plot was fairly thin, the villain not particularly great, and moral dilemmas practically absent. Finally, though, after all Trek’s travels through time, history was actually changed for once. This film resurrected a franchise thought killed by the last TNG flick.

8. Star Trek: The Undiscovered Country (6th Film, 1991)

The final film featuring the original crew (and original actors) explored Kirk’s hatred of the Klingons. With a plot mirroring (the then recent) fall of the Soviet Union, it touched on many topical issues of the day. We get to see the classic crew in action saving the universe one last time. Heck, they even get to “ride off into the sunset.”

9. Star Trek: Voyager (1995 – 2001)

This show was a mixed bag for me. Some episodes I really enjoyed, while others fell flat. After the interesting moral dilemmas and serial story lines of DS9, I felt going back to the format of TNG was a step backward. The setup for the show was perfect for the serial type of approach, as they were lost light years from home, trying to get back in one piece among alien species. However, they sadly never delved into many strong moral dilemmas, nor ever really had their ship even get banged up (except in episodes where things would reset back to perfect for the next show), and kind of just went along in a “business as normal” exploring the galaxy type of show.

10. Star Trek: The Search for Spock (3rd Film, 1984)

They planted the seed in Star Trek 2, so you knew if commercial success came, they would be going back for Spock in 3. I really enjoy the first half of the film, as they bring home the damaged Enterprise hoping to send her back to Genesis, only to learn their ship is to be scrapped and they are forbidden to save their friend. The plot to steal the Enterprise is a lot of fun, and each crew member gets a moment to shine. Self-destructing the Enterprise to take out the Klingons was a shocking development, although the rest of the movie was a disappointment. Christopher Lloyd just was not a great villain (especially compared to Khan in the preceding film). I really thought the death of Kirk’s son was done almost extraneously. The big fight on the surface of the Genesis planet between the captains was so fake, it was laughable. Still, the film fulfilled it’s purpose of bring Spock back to life.

11. Star Trek: Generations (7th Film, 1991)

I remember taking a bunch of friends to see this film for my birthday as a kid. Sadly, it didn’t live up to it’s lofty expectations. As the bridge film between the original crew and the Next Generation, it’s promise to bring Picard and Kirk together onscreen raised many possibilities. Instead of a confrontation between them in space (or maybe a team-up), we instead get them horseback riding together. Somehow, I doubt this is how most people hoped the legendary captains would meet up. It was cool to see the Next Gen ship and crew on the big screen, but the weak plot and the less-than-fulfilling death of Kirk put this film firmly in mediocrity. I really wish they would have made the finale of Next Generation into a movie instead of this, as that final episode was far superior.

12. Star Trek: The Motion Picture (1st Film, 1979)

Star Trek returned after a dormant decade and upped itself to the big screen. While this was before my time, I can imagine the excitement Trekkie’s felt over this film. The heavy sci-fi plot really took a grand view of the universe and the staging of this plot also had a grandiose feel. I wouldn’t say this movie was bad as much as it was just kind of boring. I actually like the idea behind the plot of this movie. It just really drags in spots. Beyond that, the characters seem to lack much of the life and fun that popularized the original series. Still, even today the special effects (mainly shots of the Enterprise itself) are elegant. The model work done for this film was outstanding.

13. Star Trek: Nemesis (10th Film, 2002)

In what turned out to be the final voyage of the Next Generation crew, we get what feels like a crappy rip off of The Wrath of Khan. While not horrible, it was obvious from this film that the franchise needed retooling.

14. Star Trek: Insurrection (9th Film, 1998)

This film gets a bad rap, although I don’t know if it deserves it that much. The problem with this film is that it feels just like a regular episode of the series. The plot dealt with some difficult moral dilemmas involving relocating the colonists for the greater good, although the scale needed for a motion picture was just not there. I would say the title also is a bit overstated, as when they do decide to commit insurrection against the admiral, it is quite obvious they are in the right and they would not be court martialed back home for what they did.

15. Star Trek: The Final Frontier (5th Film, 1989)

William Shatner directed this disaster, originally intended as the final entry in the series. The plot is awful, and the effects are worse. Trying to duplicate the levity in the previous Leonard Nimoy directed film, the jokes are ham-handed and just plain dumb.

16. Star Trek: Enterprise (2001 – 2005)

I honestly did not watch a lot of this show. The episodes I did watch failed to impress me. At this point in the franchise, it seemed they had run out of new ideas. Mercifully, they canceled it after only 4 seasons. Strangely, they set the finale of the show as a subplot to a mediocre episode of Next Generation, bringing back Counselor Troi and Commander Riker to star in this episode. An odd end to a ill-conceived prequel series (shouldn’t they have known better after seeing the lackluster Star Wars prequels).

I was shocked after reading a controversial USA Today article discussing the quality of meat served in America’s public schools. Would someone tell me when, exactly, did they started serving meat in school lunches?

Meat must have been added to the menu in the last few years, because the only thing I tasted in those “hamburgers” as a kid was soy. Smother them in ketchup, though, and they didn’t taste half bad. Oh, who am I kidding?

It wasn’t just the hamburgers that were awful, though. They screwed up every variety of potato ever made; (instant) mashed potatoes and gravy, tator tots, potato wedges, french fries, hash browns, and the famously derivative tri-tator (a hash brown cut in the shape of a triangle).

They earned extra points with all the kiddies when they’d bring out the broccoli or worse yet, breaded okra.

Main dishes weren’t any better. Squares of Tony’s pizza with toppings such as imitation pepperoni were bad enough. Those things were so dry, there is no way any bacteria could live there.

Worse yet, though, were the turkey and noodles. This thick substance had a greater resemblance to vomit than food, easily served up via the versatile ice-cream scoop. USA Today noted that many of today’s schools are serving birds that would normally go to pet food, but I think they literally had cooks working the sides of the roads searching for the foul fowl that went into the turkey and noodles. But what did you expect for a buck a meal?

Of course, once a month they would roll out their specialty; crunchy munchy chili with a cinnamon roll. The crunchy munchy part really just meant they put a few Fritos on top, but it sure made it sound fancy. Compared to the normal menu, the chili was a real treat. Sadly, though, you also knew that within the next week they’d reheat the decaying remnants of that great meal, add some soy and call it a sloppy joe.

Schools didn’t have a problem with meat when I was a kid. The solution is soy-mple.